Against the Grain: It really is the little things.....

All is quiet in my house right at this moment in time. The holidays are over, my birthday has come and gone, and our endless hours on the road to see our loved ones are behind us. Now is the time to reflect. Now it's time to go back over in my head all the great times we had over the past few weeks and forget about the madness that is now at rest. We are getting back into our routines again and all is well in our world. I'm so lucky to have shared the holidays with my husband's family and my own. I'm so grateful that we were able to make the trip home to NH after two very long years of not being able to go because of our money situation.
Now I'm quite humbled. The house is finally getting back to normal due to my whirlwind cleaning spree since Monday morning. The tree is gone, the decorations put away, everything has been tidied up and the presents all have a home now. Life is getting on as usual and to be quite honest, it feels so darn good! I love the holidays as much as anyone, but I MISSED this quiet. I missed this time to just be at peace while the baby naps. I missed writing, doing art projects with my Aidan and art for myself. I missed just sitting on my laptop for an hour and browsing the web for books and recipes. I'm amazed at myself for getting so "busy". I tried so hard to resist the stress of the holidays, but there really was no escaping it and I got sucked in. In the end, it's so worth it! To see how happy the children were on our Christmas morning, to watch the faces of my loved ones light up when they saw us, that's what makes it special for me.
I don't believe in New Years Resolutions....I never have. I believe in living each day as it comes and doing the best that I can in that day. I don't like making plans and I don't like to set myself up for disappointment. I make the absolute best choices as I see fit on a daily basis and live in peace. However, if there is one thing that I can say I want to change for 2011, it's to make a conscience effort to keep this feeling I currently have alive. To be fully IN THE MOMENT. To observe everything around me and learn as much I can without talking. To fully listen to people and to enjoy quiet times such as these. I could never take a vow of silence because that would just be insane and impossible for me to do. I wish I could though because it seems so ideal to me.
I read somewhere a long time ago that a wise person knows how to listen instead of speak. Don't you think that listening is the one of the most difficult things a person can master? How much do you actually listen, honestly? We are so busy trying to get our own needs fulfilled and having to roll things off our own backs when the stress kicks in, that we don't realize we aren't listening or paying attention to anything around us. My one promise to myself this year is to do just that....listen....carefully....every single year, until the end.